My friend Anna used to have an accountant who worked very well at first but then the relationship went south. Anna is a person who likes to talk things through, but sadly with this accountant she felt she had to let her go. She felt bad because the account was doing her job badly due to some personal issues, but as I said to Anna: she shouldn’t mix personal with professional life. You can’t wait for weeks for an email reply from your accountant.
Anna finally let her go and found a new one. The new one was awesome, replies instantly and takes care of everything Anna needs.
I used to have an accountant, who like Anna’s, used to work very well at first, but then everything got messy. She missed several deadlines, which led to me being fined and she wasn’t working very well. One day I got a letter which said that my taxes hadn’t been paid on time, again. I talked to B (my accountant) and the excuse was so lame and so obviously a lie that I had to fire her.
You don’t want your account to lie to you, or not reply for weeks. And that made me wonder: how similar is that to what we want from our partner? It seems so simple, yet after a while, the relationship starts going south.
However, one day you have the courage and decide to let your partner, and account go. What a relief. You feel new again, like you can put your life back together, emotionally and financially, respectively.
A few days later, or a few months later, you find a new partner, and a new account. Life seems to go well, your relationship is blooming (the first few months are always rainbows and sunshine) and your finances are looking pretty organized. He always calls, your account always answers. Life seems perfect until they come back.
One day Anna and I were hanging out when she received a message: “Don’t forget that tomorrow is the last day to present the tax forms”. It was her old accountant.
“Now she keeps track of the deadlines!”
My phone rang: “Hi how are you?” It was my ex.
Anna and I looked at each other: what was happening? She was happily working with a new accountant and I was happily single and healed.
Why do accountants and ex partners appear when you have moved on? Why do they act like we wanted them to act before breaking up with them but simply a few months too late? Do they have some sort of sensor: hey, she is doing alright, let me text her?
I honestly don’t know but I do believe that there are four people you should truly trust in your life: your partner, your psychologist, your accountant and your lawyer. You should always be honest with them in order for the relationship to work.
Anna had a very healthy approach. She politely replied and then let her go. I went for the rollercoaster type of road. I replied and fell for the guy again. A few months later we had broken up due to the same reasons as the first time.
I initially asked why do accountants and ex-partners come back at the worst time? To be honest, I have no idea. The only thing I now know, is that the way we respond to that comeback will determine if we get our hearts broken again or we continue single but healed.
Lesson learnt: always stay with your good account and don't go back to ex-boyfriends.